Wanker files charges against wanker.

You have to ask yourself what the hell is going on in the minds of politicians and bureaucrats in Florida. What a bunch of useless wankers and that is the topic of this post -- wanking. For the Yanks that is the act of solitary pleasure. For the religious it is the sin of Onanism (though in fact Onan was practicing coitus interruptus -- for which God had him killed indicating that God could get work in the state of Florida).

Terry Alexander is twenty. You guys remember twenty. Lots of hormones. Now, lets not think Mr. Alexander is a nice guy. He is in jail, and even more suprisingly, he is in jail for a real crime not one of those phony crimes that politicians invent with such ease.

Jail affords no privacy. The Broward County Sheriff’s office says that privacy simply doesn’t exist in prison. Doors are removed from toilets so guards can watch prisoners take a dump -- how lovely. And the cells are in plain view. And they have little monitors all over the place to watch prisoners --- in other words, its almost like living in England.

Mr. Alexander was sitting alone in his cell on his bunk. And he was feeling a bit, shall we say, frustrated. His hormones were getting to him. So he took matters into hand the way nature intended -- there is a good reason that arms are that long! It’s intelligent design.

But watching Mr. Alexander is Big Brother, or in this case, Big Mother (and I assure you that Mother is only the first name of this woman). For some reason the Broward Sheriff’s office hires women to spy on naked men in prison. But the woman in this case was a stuck up prude who acts like she sat down on a broom stick and had it disappear up her back end. That would be the real wanker in this story, a voyeur by the name of Coryus Veal. I would also bet doughnuts she’s a religious nutter. Just a guess on my part, however, but it fits the profile.

Veal is paid by the county to watch men strip and change clothes. This kinky woman watches them sitting on the toilet and she watches them on their beds when they are alone. And then she gets offended if she sees them naked. What sort of moron is this woman? What a cow -- she isn’t named Veal by accident., She’s on a crusade to stamp out the solitary vice among male prison inmates.

No doubt in her spare time she campaigns to abolish gravity, hurricanes and the tides. This woman has a screw loose. She filed charges against Mr. Alexander for “indecent exposure”. How cheeky. She sits there, getting her jollies by spying on naked men. She watches them in their cells changing clothes. She watches them on the toilets. But if they dare have an erection that needs attention this moronic jailer gets offended and has fits of hysteria. She needs a sedative, a therapist and a vibrator -- though Florida is in the South so the later might possibly be illegal. If so that would explain a lot concerning the problems this woman has.

And Mr. Alexander was not the first victim of this vice crusader. This silly woman has filed similar charges against seven other men in prison in the last six months. She has a screw loose. She is a sexual pervert, if you ask me. She obviously is watching for any sign of self-pleasure. It isn’t as if these men can close the doors for privacy.

And since we are in the sexual metaphor realm today it should be noted that Officer Veal was also screwing over the taxpayers. Mr. Alexander had pled guilty to robberty and was scheduled to be moved to the state prison system. But because Officer Veal filed indencent exposure charges against him he was left in the Broward Country jail until that case could be heard. The cost for the extra time in the county jail was about $21,000. In addition the cost for the public defender was another $1,150. Those are still only a fraction of the costs that this sexually frustrated woman is imposing.

The judge has to be paid. As do court reporters and all the individeuals involved in that process. There is the cost of transporting the man to the court room and back to jail again. There is the cost of filing the charges, the costs of the public prosecuter (who has to be something of a moron as well). Even Veal must leave her job to testify, requiring the state to hire a replacement for the day, along with paying Veal as well. And there are the costs which are imposed on innocent members of the public, the jurors, who have to give up their life to sit to learn the shocking fact that men in prison masturbate.

Actually I don’t feel much compassion for the jurors in this case. They deserve to be put in jail themselves. They actually convicted the man.

And it still gets more bizarre. Mr. Alexaander was given a sentence of an additional 60 days in jail. Again the taxpayers will have to pay for that.

Consider the absurdity of the bureaucrats. A spokesvermin for the State Attorney’s Office says: “Generally, we prosecute such cases in which the inmate exposes himself in such plain view of the detention staff or other persons.” But, at the same time, another spokesvermin for the Sheriff’s office says there is no privacy: “That’s why there are no doors on the bathrooms. That’s why detention deputies monitor what you do and when you do it.”

So they strip away the privacy of the prisoner, okay, perhaps that’s even fair though I suspect they overdo it. But if you strip away the privacy of people only some total idiot would then get offended if they see the person naked, or with an erection, or masturbating. If you are going to “monitor” everything these men do it is hardly fair to claim that they are guilty of indecent exposure.

This is tantamount to a peeper calling the police to complain that the woman, into whose apartment he is peering, is naked.

Juror David Sherman argued that no one on the jury had a problem with masturbation. As he said: “None of us had any problem with masturbation in private.” That seems to ignore the Sheriff’s claim that there is no privacy in jail and that Veal is there to monitor everything these men do when they do it.

Spokesvermin Ron Ishoy, for the State Attorney’s Office says: “Female detention deputies are human beings, too. Why should they have to view such vulgar and indencent behavior in their place of work?

Apparently Mr. Ishoy is not too bright. Why should they “view” such things? Maybe because they are paid to spy on men in the privacy of their own cell. Maybe a woman who is paid to watch men deficate and shower ought not be able to complain if the man has an erection that needs attention. Professional voyeurs don’t have room to bitch.

Now Mr. Alexander was offered a plea. If he admitted to indencent exposure he would be sentenced only with time served. So why didn’t he take it? He was worried because an indecent exposure charge would be on his record and that could trigger registration as a sex offender. And the way it would appear in the files the man was guilty of sexual acts in a public place -- see the prison cell is consider a public space. Another misapplication of the overreach of sex offender laws.

To show illustrate how moronic Veal is consider this exchange between her and the public defender, Kathleen McHugh. McHugh asked: “Did other inmates start masturbating because of Mr. Alexander? Did you call a SWAT team?”

“I wish I had.” This Veal woman said she wished she had called a SWAT team because a man, in his own bed, was having having a toss.

One press report says McHughes,

...criticized Veal for choosing a job where she was bound to see such behavior, for construing Alexander's sexual impulses as all about her, and for being the only corrections deputy, male or female, to bring such charges against inmates.

In my humble opinion it is Officer Veal who is the real wanker in this case. And she is also the proud winner of our Moron of the Week award.